What Is Postpartum Rage?
Ever feel like you’re losing it on your kids or partner and not sure how your anger got to this point?
Mama, you’re not alone.
It’s common to feel angry postpartum, especially among overwhelmed moms.
What Is Postpartum Rage?
You imagined having a new baby being one of the happiest times of your life. You knew it’s common to feel like an overwhelmed mom, but you didn’t expect to feel so angry postpartum. You can be going about your day, something can set you off, and you suddenly are completely worked up and in an episode of anger. Maybe you’re finding that many little things are getting to you throughout the day and that you are irritable and on edge.
When it feels like you suddenly explode with anger after having a baby, this is postpartum rage. Moments of postpartum rage are very common, especially in the first few weeks after giving birth. Sometimes, postpartum rage can be a sign of a postpartum mood disorder, like postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety.
Postpartum Rage Symptoms
Everyone’s postpartum experience is unique. Throughout our experience providing postpartum counseling, we have worked with many people with different postpartum rage symptoms.
Common postpartum rage symptoms include:
Intense anger that feels like it comes on suddenly
Hard time managing anger when it does come on
Feeling irritable much of the time
Feeling overwhelmed most of the time
Raising your voice or swearing more
Your anger making you feel like not yourself
Getting into more arguments with those around you, including your partner
Having a hard time moving past something that upset you
Crying more
Worry, anxiety, and feeling on edge
Feeling a lack of control
Having a hard time connecting with your baby
Not enjoying the things you normally enjoy doing
What Causes Postpartum Rage
Many factors can cause postpartum rage. Here are a few of the most common ones:
Your hormones are rebalancing after giving birth. Your estrogen and progesterone hormones undergo significant changes after giving birth, which can have impacts on your mood.
You had a difficult pregnancy and/or birth trauma. A pregnancy or birth trauma that didn’t go as you imagined or your baby spending time in the NICU can make you feel out of control and provoke a lot of different emotions including worry, guilt, shame, sadness, anger, and even moments of happiness.
You aren’t sleeping well. It’s extremely common to sleep poorly, especially in the beginning. Research on sleep and mood has shown that the amount of sleep you get and the quality of that sleep can impact your mood.
How Long Does Postpartum Rage Last?
Many overwhelmed moms ask me how long does postpartum rage last? They want to know when the postpartum rage will stop and when they will feel like themselves again. There is no clear cut answer. It depends on the factors that are contributing to why you are feeling angry postpartum and what kinds of coping strategies you know and are willing to use to handle these postpartum rage moments. If you’re not sure what factors are playing a role in why you are feeling angry postpartum or if your strategies for handling postpartum rage actually work, a postpartum therapist can help you figure this out.
Many overwhelmed moms wonder if postpartum rage means they have postpartum depression.
Does Postpartum Rage Mean I Have Postpartum Depression?
Not necessarily. It’s normal to have moments of postpartum rage and to feel angry postpartum. After all, you’re not sleeping normally and don’t have much time for self-care or doing the things you normally enjoy doing. If you find your anger and postpartum rage to be intense and around more often than not and if it’s been several weeks or even months since you gave birth, it’s worth meeting with a postpartum therapist to check for postpartum depression. You don’t have to suffer. A postpartum therapist can help.
Postpartum Rage Toward Husband, Partner, and/or Co-Parent
Maybe you feel angry postpartum when your husband says something in a certain tone, asks you a question you feel like they should know, or chews loudly. Many overwhelmed moms find their anger and postpartum rage comes out towards their husband, partner, and/or co-parent. We tend to express anger towards people in our life who are our loved ones. Without realizing it, it’s like your mind convinces itself that your loved ones love you so there won’t be as bad of consequences if you let out your anger towards them versus towards someone else or your newborn baby. Overwhelmed moms can feel extra pressure to avoid showing or feeling anger when around their baby. Bottling up anger and trying to stay peaceful when you are actually angry can sometimes make anger grow and then bubble up when someone else, like your partner, comes around.
How to Deal with Postpartum Rage & Postpartum Rage Treatment
You may be wondering about postpartum rage treatment. You don’t have to experience postpartum rage alone. A postpartum therapist can help. A common treatment is meeting with a postpartum therapist in weekly therapy. Many overwhelmed moms prefer online therapy because it is easier to fit into their schedules. In online therapy with a postpartum therapist, you will get curious about your postpartum rage moments to really understand what is going on. Often, anger and sadness go hand in hand. With a postpartum therapist, you will learn strategies that actually work to handle those intense anger moments and all the feelings that come with them. Connecting with other new and overwhelmed moms can also be very helpful. Postpartum Support International offers many free online support groups. If you are interested in considering medication options, you can meet with a perinatal psychiatrist to explore the options available to you.
Begin Online Therapy for Postpartum Rage with a Postpartum Therapist in Miami, FL Soon!
At Natal Counseling in Miami, FL, we offer mental health counseling and therapy to people who want to live calmer, happier, and more fulfilled. Our clinical psychologist Dr. Marisa Perera, PhD, is a postpartum and maternal mental health expert who can help you start your journey toward a healthier and happier life with less postpartum rage. To learn more about how we can help with feelings of anger postpartum or help you figure out if you are experiencing postpartum depression, please reach out to us. We look forward to hearing from you!
Other Online Therapy Services Offered at Natal Counseling
You are not alone if you are dealing with mental health struggles. We will walk alongside you while you are on your journey to healing. If you are looking for additional help with Natal Counseling, we offer a variety of services. We offer therapy for anxiety, online infertility therapy, fertility therapy, miscarriage counseling, postpartum anxiety therapy, postpartum depression therapy, birth trauma & postpartum PTSD treatment, and therapy for moms and parents. Ready to regain control and start moving forward in your life? We are here to help.
